connecting with people becomes easy once you understand this

I share ideas, tools and things I’m building to help you act with more confidence, clarity and self-trust for free here: https://www.newelofknowledge.com/ your support (a coffee a month) helps keep what I do alive 🥹, ily either way: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC5fy9izAhlANCISUdU8quDg/join Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/newelofknow/?hl=en-gb X: https://twitter.com/NewelOfKnow Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/1FRO4KMCcP09uojMjo4Xi2?si=e1d9ac403b214520 Articles & papers mentioned: Lapka & Kung's work: - https://psyche.co/ideas/wish-you-had-more-self-control-you-should-hear-the-downsides Expressive suppression paper: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/12899316/ 0:00 A ticket to friendship (story)… 6:01 Distillation 7:18 The key takeaway from this whole video 11:14 What we’ll cover (go deeper) 12:27 (1) The research that backs up these claims 14:17 (2) The psychology (why people see the self-controlled as low warmth) 22:18 The summary so far 23:42 (3) The real social costs of high competence, low warmth 30:54 (4) The root cause (why “cold” people are really just armoured) 36:10 (5) What to do next (if it’s you) 45:35 (6) What to do next (if it’s them) 53:55 Summary & outro rizz